There used to be a time in my life when all I wanted was to live more like in a Spanish movie. Like the movies made by Pedro Almodóvar. With drama, emotions, chaos and sensations.
Not because I wanted to live a life exactly like the characters in those movies, but probably because of some kind of longing to feel a wider register of feelings. In a way; to experience more of life I suppose…
When I first discovered his movies in my teens I got totally swept away. I just had to go to Spain!!! (and so I did).
However, this was long before kids. Long before my everyday life experience with emotions like rollercoasters and thunderstorms. With chaos in doses of small cyclones, with rains full of tears and with sunshine purely full of love.
Sometimes I think to myself that I really didn’t have a clue at that time when I was 17 and for the first time said to myself that I wanted my life to be a bit more like a Spanish movie…
Because we are certainly four individuals with a wide register of feelings in this family right now. Working on our patience and trying our best to give each other space. Space for everyone’s different emotions and space so that everyone can explode under the same roof at the same time.
We’re like a mixed box of fireworks. And I think we are contributing quite well to the mix all the fours of us. But Vanja is certainly the most talented one when it comes to fully living out her emotions at every single moment. And it’s a true skill for sure. I am really amazed to see her navigating between all those different types of emotions and reactions. Full of drama. But for real.
So all of a sudden I don’t have to go to Spain at all. It is fully enough to stay at home in the kitchen and try to cook a simple dinner, while one single scene most likely will include the deepest downs and the highest heights within seconds. There is always someone in the house with a mood that needs to explode and be put somewhere outside the body. In forms of tears, slamming in doors, cryouts while lying down on the floor, happy dance moves, high fives, hugs or kisses.
And I love it. ❤
But nowadays it also happens that I sometimes think about that pale and dull colors in the movies by Roy Anderson. Calm and boring. Just for a day or two – maybe it could be nice?
Pedro Almodóvar vs Roy Andersson.
Our Normal Family Story 